Learning to Say 'No'
No! Sometimes it is okay to say no!
Are you a people pleaser? Have you ever found yourself saying yes to something that you want to say no to? Do you put others requests/issues before your own needs? Some people struggle to say no to the people around them, even if they want to say no.
Of course, sometimes we should set aside our own desires and help others because it is humane to be kind, humble and giving. But sometimes we need to exercise our own feelings and actually just say no! Otherwise, this ends up putting ourselves in a situation where we are not happy, where we waste time and not just our time but theirs too! I believe that if you are going to do something you should give 100%, otherwise what is the point? Another point to add, not being able to say no also gives the opportunity to be taken advantage of!
So, think! Let’s make a change and start to exercise that amazing word of ‘NO’! Be brave and say NO when you want to! Because only YOU can make your dreams a priority, and it can become difficult to do so if you don’t give time to see those dreams through!
It’s possible that you struggle saying no to people for a fear of letting them down or aggravating them – but if you say yes when you want to say no then ultimately the only person that you are letting down is yourself.
When struggling to say no to someone, just remember that this person does not have to spend every waking moment with you, this person does not have to listen to the thoughts that are constantly running through your mind, they don’t have to feel every inch of your emotions or feel your subconscious every day – they have to experience all of this in themselves – the only one who has to experience all of this with you, the only one who will always be with you 24/7, is you. You are the only one who is guaranteed to be with you forever – so why not listen to what is best for you?
This is not to say that you should reject any request, offer or opportunity that is ever presented to you – and yes of course sometimes we will have to step outside of our comfort zone to figure out what is the best for us, but limiting the time you give to others will allow more time to give to yourself to take care of your own needs; catching up on your favourite tv show, spending quality time with friends/family, a relaxing bubble bath or even getting a good nights sleep. Some of these may seem insignificant in the grand scheme of things, but do not underestimate how important it is to care for your own needs. You are always the person that should come first in your life – you must live for you. Again, this is not to say that you shouldn’t care for others, for example you may have dependants to care for as well as yourself – just remember that it is absolutely essential for your health and wellbeing that you make time to practice self-care.
Whether this is your first time setting boundaries and saying no to others or you are struggling with previously set boundaries, if ever you feel that you need additional support or guidance, please reach out to contact us at events@yes-its-possible.org